J@wstin: blog :

So i started my internship at EHDD last friday and it was a bittersweet experience so far. While i am extremely grateful that i have lucked out for once in my life by getting a good firm, the practice field of architecture has made me terrified of graduating. On last friday i met everyone at the firm and got a quick tour, then i had lunch with the intern coordinators, and in the afternoon i worked on a transportation map and organizing construction documents. This wednesday, i spent half of the day rhinoing the support system of an "ecosystem" signage and the other half renderings three different color schemes for an entrance way. I spend about an hour and half commuting every time, and during those long bart rides i cant help but let my mind wander. I used to be excited to start working, to show the world what i can do, to apply the things i have learned in school, and to find an outlet for all my adolescent angst. But the reality is never the same as dreams. At the end of the wednesday, when i walked five blocks to the bart stop, i cant help but felt empty inside. Unlike school, work is confined and broken. You do things according to other people's schedule without really knowing where the finish line is. You work because it's your job.
I know im starting to sound pessimitic and negative, but what im trying to saying to say is that people shouldnt always live for the future. I shouldn't always live through my plans, because as sad as it is to say, plans never come true. and when they fail, I make another plan. This is wrong. I've been wrong. And that was the most valuable thing i have learned from my internship so far.